Review: SEVEN PSYCHOPATHS

I can safely say you won’t see this one coming. Not because there is an unexpected twist at the end - or some other kind of cop-out - but because the characters in this movie are so unpredictable there is really no way of knowing what direction they are pointing their gun at, or when they might pull the trigger - accidentally or otherwise. This is a richly self aware movie, where the characters are literally writing the movie on the go. In an age where most movie characters - and writers - lack freewill and subscribe to common genre conventions a script like this might appear to lack direction or cohesion. But that is not the case here; it is just rare to see a movie where the characters truly have control of the events that surround them. Writer / director Martin McDonagh has done what many writers aspire to by breathing freewill into his characters.  

Review: ARGO

Every now and then there comes a story so preposterous and incredible that you know it has to be true; no Hollywood screenwriter could have come up with it. Ben Affleck’s new film, in which he stars and directed, is one of those cases. The film opens with an animated intro covering the events that led to the Iranian Revolution; “This is the land of The Persian Empire”, it begins - as if this were going to be a large fantasy epic. But Argo is no fantasy and the film is ten times more gripping because of it. 

Like most average movie goers, I am not particularly fond of modern day political thrillers. They involve a lot of characters sitting around, discussing “stuff” in complex jargon as if they were playing chess. Even the acclaimed Syriana was a bit of a bore. There is some chess playing in Argo but it is mostly for a set characters to pass the time; most of the film is all show business. 

Review: THE DARK KNIGHT RISES

So finally here it is; the epic conclusion to Christopher Nolan’s Batman re-imaging delivers both an incredibly good movie and a well rounded third part for a trilogy that has been all about deconstructing the hero myth. Usually, the third part of a trilogy - or any extended franchise - tends to be an underwhelming mess, as if no one knew where to take the story or what to do with the characters. Whether or not Nolan had a plan since the beginning is hard to tell, but The Dark Knight Rises could convince me that he did. Nolan tells a long coherent story across three films; amazingly all three films  could work by themselves, but together they form an almost perfect three-act opera.

Review: TED

It is going to be hard to convince you -or anyone for that matter - that Ted, a movie about a foulmouthed pot-smoking teddy bear, is a relevant work of literature that should have your critical consideration. But, please, indulge me as I try to do so. 

As you would expect from the creator of Family Guy, Ted is an avalanche of raunchy comedy, politically incorrect humor, and four-letter one liners that could put any other comedy of the kind to shame. But aside from its superficial humor, Ted is also one of the most honest movies about buddy-bro-hood and arrested adolescence out there. Add these together and you realize that Ted is mostly funny because its true. 

Review: TO ROME WITH LOVE

I believe it was Socrates who said, the unexamined life is not worth living; at 76 and with over forty films attributed to his name, Woody Allen has now examined his life and then examined himself examining his life. After Midnight in Paris -his most successful film in terms of revenue- Woody Allen takes a step back and returns to his more traditional depiction of neurotic characters observing, describing, philosophizing about, and suffering because of love, life, universal inconsequence, and - for the first time - Rome. 

To Rome With Love, is a collection of four vignettes all set in Rome. Each vignette could have been separate stand alone film. And some of them would have likely been more enjoyable that way. We are introduced to the four vignettes by a traffic cop; who from his pedestal in the middle of the road observes everything. Or so he claims. 

Traditionalist may criticize Allen for abandoning New York and “selling” to tourism boards that want to show off the most beautiful cities in the world - London (Match Point, Cassandra’s Dream), Barcelona (Vicky, Cristina, Barcelona) and Midnight in Paris (Paris)- but, personally, I like how my pseudo-intellectual self can relax and enjoy a Roman holiday alongside my giddy low-brow tourist self, while enjoying these romantic Euro locales, and conversing with characters as neurotic as... my neurotic self. 

Review: MOONRISE KINGDOM

It seems that Wes Anderson has been practicing with every movie he makes to one day deliver a masterpiece. That day may never come, but it doesn’t matter. Each of his films, so far, have been a hell of an exercise towards that  goal. And as a spectator, I've been enjoying the ride. Moonrise Kingdom may not be very different from your typical Wes Anderson film; after all, it is still part of these exercise. But then again- aside from centered frames and dry humor- what is a typical Wes Anderson film? 

Consider the film's opening, which is told against an educational breakdown of the variations and instruments on a theme by Purcell. Anderson is bluntly telling the audience he will be playing by his own rules- as he usually does. And like the educational soundtrack the film is broken down, and each element is introduced separately before it all comes together in a litteral cliffhanger. 

Review: IN TIME

Value is a thing of faith. Cash is physically worth nothing but paper, ink, and in the case of coins, metal. Sometimes, as in the case of the penny the metal is worth more than the value attached to the object; the copper in a penny is worth 1.5 cents approximately, but most of the times it is the reverse; a $100 bill costs about 50 cents to make. I won’t claim to be an expert in economics, but I do understand why some people argue that we should go back to the gold standard (whatever that means), or just get rid of cash altogether and switch to digital points as if life were a video games. I'm pretty sure we are much closer to actually doing the latter than going back to metallic standards.


In Time, comes up with an intriguing proposal about using our lifetime as -basically- cash. A cup of coffee costs ninety minutes of your life, a taxi to midtown a year. In this world the rich are semi-immortal, with a million years to spend, and the poor live day by day; spending most of their daily wages on sleep just so they can rest in order to earn their hours the next day. 

Review: BERNIE

Small town, middle Americans are mocked as uncultured, uneducated, discriminatory and naïve. At the same time, many of the residents pride themselves on simple joys, practical know-how, camaraderie and displaying trust. Having grown up in Kansas and lived in other places, I’ve lived through interactions of both states of mind and saw each on display yet again in Richard Linklater’s refreshing and personable film, “Bernie.”

Linklater, while not quite worthy of household recognition, is essentially the Otto Graham of Mumblecore cinema and to a lesser extent, the indie film movement from the early nineties. In such a sense, Linklater is as condemnable (if not more so) as Quentin Tarantino for his legions of film school imitators who have far less to offer the world than their silver screen superstars. As he has for the last twenty years, Linklater’s newest movie can only knock at the door of mainstream cinema—which is a sad limitation given the quiet brilliance of “Bernie.”

Review: THE PIRATES! BAND OF MISFITS

It's been a while since we've last seen a true-blue animated film that was more-or-less created in the painstakingly crafted stop-motion technique. Maybe it's just me, but when you look at one of these kinds of films and realize that each character model or set piece was physically made by the God-given human hand, the resulting illusion on screen becomes just as extraordinary and remarkable as any CGI-laden motion picture. We've seen an onslaught of computer-animated films recently, so it's nice to see that The Pirates! Band of Misfits - from the same creators of Chicken Run - are back at the ready to startle the eyes and the minds of average moviegoers with its visually stunning stop-motion antics.

Review: CHRONICLE

Anyone who has ever bullied another kid in school should be forced to watch Chronicle. It's easily the best "found footage" movie so far. Chronicle took everything that was good about Cloverfield, Quarantine, The Blair Witch Project, and others and kept it, all the while eliminating and fixing the things that were wrong with those films. Chronicle is a very good movie.

Review: THE TROLL HUNTER

           The Troll Hunter (aka Trolljegeren) is, for lack of a better expression, one interesting monster. On one hand it is just another B-level mockumentary ala Blair Witch Project, or Cloverfield that is allegedly edited from found footage rolled by a group of teenagers tracking a troll hunter. But it is also a damn good monster movie, and a decent drama about survival in the Norwegian backwoods. This can be mostly attributed to the fact that, unlike most horror-muckumentaires, The Troll Hunter has a decent in-story cameraman. So, even though the genre still requires tremendous amounts of queasy-cam, we actually get to see quite a good amount of troll shots. I for one greatly appreciated this.

Review: THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO

            I knew what was coming. I saw the Swedish film when it first came out. And read the book afterwards. Yet nothing could have prepared me for the visceral intensity that David Fincher’s take on the story of Lisbeth Salander (Ronney Mara) holds. Stieg Larsson’s story is already a gripping thriller that needs no further advertising. This is the story of a girl with a terrible past, who is proudly isolated and dangerously angry; the first installment doesn’t dwell too deep into the back-story, but it lays out a twisted series of murders where the broken heroine begins to heal.

Review: THE ADVENTURES OF TINTIN

Steven Spielberg was born to direct animation. He's easily one of the most cinematically creative people of all time, and The Adventures of Tintin is mind-blowing showcase of what movies would look like if Spielberg was not limited to the restrictions of live-action. The Adventures of Tintin is, if nothing else, Steven Spielberg without limits.

Review: MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE - GHOST PROTOCOL

The first thing I will point out in my comments about the newest installment of the Mission: Impossible franchise is that the above image is not green-screened. Tom Cruise really did this.

SO THAT'S COOL I GUESS.

Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol is easily the best installment of the franchise and I find it hard to believe any upcoming sequels will top it. Brad Bird - one of my all-time favorite filmmakers - has revived a franchise I would have considered dead with an excellent action movie that I would never have expected to enjoy as much as I did.

Review: YOUNG ADULT

I like Jason Reitman's movies because he tell stories about people. He has never opted to tell great war stories or period pieces, but instead paints a picture of a quirky individual. This is refreshing, interesting, and relatable every single time. Young Adult is no exception. Reitman, once again collaborating with former stripper/Academy Award-winning screenwriter Diablo Cody, has pumped out another hit to stand alongside Thank You For Smoking, Juno, and Up in the Air.

Review: HAPPY FEET 2

I once argued that Happy Feet was the greatest cinematic achievement of all time. However, I came to the realization that using penguins should be considered cheating; their cuteness can only be rivaled by lol-cats. Nevertheless the original Happy Feet remained a fairly entertaining movie with a positive message. The type of film most people want to see when they go to a family film. Happy Feet 2 builds on that and gives it a shinier polish. It is neither better nor worse than the original, just different enough to be an equal and, despite the trailers, not the huge cliché that you are expecting.

There is still a happy ending. But this is a family film called Happy Feet. Anything else would have been a tremendous folly.

Review: THE THREE MUSKETEERS

Boy, oh boy, oh boy! Is this my type of action swashbuckler? Oh yes it is! The newest adaptation of The Three Musketeers by Paul W. S. Anderson, the man behind the Resident Evil movies, incorporates so much swashbuckling, sword fighting, double agents, airships, plotting and plot turns, as well as 17^th century fashion, you might mistake it for a an all time classic… that is if it weren’t for the campy use of 3D, Mila Jovovich’s bad acting, modern slang being incorporated into the dialogue, and 75 million dollars worth of special effects.

Critics have been harsh. But they are missing the point. This is the Three Musketeers! AKA the original blockbuster! And like any serial written by Alexander Dumas you would know they are all about the swashbuckling, campy dialogue, and social mischief. And if he had a say on these matters, Dumas would insist in all the adaptations of his novels being filmed with the most candid use of 3D. So before you continue reading, do note that I am not being sarcastic here; I thoroughly enjoyed this adaptation of The Three Musketeers, and can argue that it is as good as any other.

Review: 50/50

Learning that you have a dangerous cancer and that your chances of survival are 50/50 when you are in your late 20s and you haven’t even been to Canada must be the most difficult news to cope with. But Adam (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) takes it surprisingly well - at first. What seems to bother him more is the way his friends and family seem to handle it. Although he is told that his chances are 50/50, Adam would very much like to keep on living like he used to even if he knows he is going to die. Cancer however might have other plans.

Review: THE HELP

Some might argue that The Help presents itself as too rosy a movie for a movie about the lives of black maids in the South during the Jim Crow Days. That a movie of its kind should attempt to be painful, and provocative, not, as this movie is, a feel-good dramedy with a white girl as its top billing. But why does it need to be painful? Personally I believe the exaggerated pain drama only help propagate the problem they claim to be fighting against (I am referring of course to Crash, and the like). And that The Help might be just so much more effective a movie because it is not that: it just shows things as they were without caring for exaggerated drama.

Review: DRIVE

There is a silent elegance to the way Drive presents itself; there is some clear nostalgia at work, as the film tries to emulate classic noir of the 60s and 70s, which results in a film that is very different from what modern day viewers are used to. But despite the nostalgia, Drive has suffered time’s filter nevertheless. Today all car chases are loud, explosive, and somewhat incoherent. With this background in mind, I welcome a movie like Drive; a movie that takes its time to explore the craft of driving. When you think about it logically car chase should be much more about stealth and avoiding the spotlight than blowing up half of downtown LA.