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Wednesday, January 19, 2011


There was no reason to ever make this movie. The studio could have made a funnier movie starting the same actors "by the people who brought you Meet the Fockers" and it would have been just as successful, if not more so because it would have been funnier. The funniest moments in this film occur within the first ten minutes as the film gives a quick recap on the quirkiness of each character and the relationships amongst them. It takes a dive to the pits of boredom from then on.
Little Fockers

There is really not much more to say. This is an example of the screenwriting crisis that has plagued Hollywood over the past few years; studios are officially incapable of coming up with new ideas on their own. Only rare exceptions of individual filmmakers are really doing an effort. For the most part Hollywood keeps treating its audiences like a mentally challenged crowd. What is sad is that most audiences are behaving like this anyway. Yet this is a new level of low. How experienced actors like Robert DeNiro, Barbara Streisand and Dustin Hoffman ended up here is a mystery. It is not like they seriously need the money. They know what a good script is; didn't anyone at any point in the development of this movie went, "this is a piece of crap". Maybe it was in their contract since they signed up for the second one but even then they didn't sign up to be in such a piece of crap. The franchise could have survived without a sequel with a spinoff about Owen Wilson's character.

I have to hand it Owen, in the last month I've seen to movies that against all odds he somehow manages to salvage them from being utter train wrecks. In this case it is because he is clearly the only one conformable playing the character he is playing. If you remember from the first movie Wilson plays, Kevin the eccentric millionaire, who is in first name basis with Jesus and Buddah that used to date Pam Focker neƩ Byrnes (Teri Polo) in college. I'd pay good money to see a pseudo-biopic of that character. At the opposite end is new-comer to the franchise Jessica Alba, who gives the most humiliating performance I have ever seen recorded on film and video (and I've seen lots of home videos). If you are the type of person who spends hours on YouTube watching videos of people tripping, falling, being attacked by a kitten, or any other watching any other low form of cruel entertainment I'd suggest you go watch this movie and enjoy how a beautiful (and somewhat talented) young actress humiliates herself over and over and over again for your entertainment. Go ahead and laugh loudly; be as cruel as you want you can even point and not have to feel sorry for her.

If you haven't figured out the plot, it is simple Jack Byrnes (DeNiro) believes Greg Gaylord Foc
ker (Ben Stiller) is cheating on Pam with Andi (Alba) and so he goes with his usual CIA shenanigans (that is a word that should have never had to be used to describe a DeNiro performance) only to find out Gay really loves Pam. Oops did I ruin the ending?

There is one more note I do have. Early on when we are introduced to Alba's character, Stiller and her (who are both nurses) perform and enema on one fat patient. This was supposed to be both sexy and funny. I understand there are some people out who are turned on by enemas but I always thought this was a niche fetish like bestiality. And while poo-poo and pee-pee humor is alright for 8 year old's and younger it doesn't in a movie entitle Little Fockers. Oh, I get it this was supposed to be a porno! Silly me. Well the movie fails at that even more than it fails at being a mainstream comedy.

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